Dealing With A Traumatic Memory That Keeps Coming Back?
I hate asking personal questions here but I have a very strong yet irrational fear of psychiatrists/psychologists/psychotherap… anyone in that group and I need suggestions. Every September I descend into a state of depression and have callbacks to a very traumatic event in my past and each year, the flashbacks and nightmares get more intense and now I keep hearing it echo through my head and I keep having emotional breakdowns. I’m afraid to go out in public in fear of freaking out for no reason.
The memory in questions involves the fate of my elder sister Kumiko. When I was only 7 years old she was taking care of me while mum was out of town, and she had to go out briefly to get some food for dinner but over an hour passed on what is a 15 minute walk and I got nervous and went out on the porch with the flashlight every so often and called. Eventually I heard a response, a cry for help. I nervously followed it and found her crawling back home; I had no idea what this truly meant at the time, but she had been raped and beaten. I ran back home and called the police but quickly ran back to her side afterwords and tried to carry her but couldn’t find the strength and she died from her injuries right in front of me.
At first it was mostly just nightmares or a bad memory back to that night, but as I said over the years the memories and visions get worse and it is always around this time of year that it happens as it was around this time of year that she was killed. This time they have seeped into more than just nightmares but fullblown hallucinations, I had a freak out and even falsely called the police because I had entered a freak out and thought that it had happened all over but with my wife. I blanked out, but she claimed that I was literally cowering by her and pleading her not to let go of life.
Why do I keep having these flashbacks every year? Is there a condition that causes this? How can I learn to deal and cope with it? Any suggestions would mean a lot to me..
October 20th, 2011 at 2:18 pm
this is PTSD post traumatic stress disorder. The reason ‘every year ‘ at the same day , is because the day and things that remind you of her , trigger the memories and feelings. They call these ‘anniversary dates’ . Thoughts, feelings, sights, smells , sounds, etc, can also trigger the flashbacks.
There are two main therapies that can treat this condition,and I will give you the
sources below.
I prefer the EFT which is known to be highly effective with this and other disorders.
You should also rebuild your adrenals , which are the source of the flashbacks as well., form prolonged stress.
best wishes to you and yours. There was nothing you could do , it sounds. peace
October 20th, 2011 at 5:37 pm
http://www.youtube.com/user/lawlzxobriii… please watch those it’s exactly what you’re going through and aside from the advice it’s nice to know you’re not alone, plus it gives you someone to talk to !
October 20th, 2011 at 8:51 pm
The reason you probably have these flashbacks is because you never have coped with it in some way. You were so young, this is highly traumatic for a young child. I’m surprised you didn’t see a child psychologist back then. I seriously recommend you to see a psychologist, they will help you put things in perspective, sort our feelings and deal with it. Psychologists are not dangerous, they are there to help you:) You’ll get a much higher life quality if you do. All events in your lives does affect us, even if we like it or not, experiences shapes us. However, in your case the experience have shaped you badly and it is affecting your life quality.
So see a psychologist, it will be worth it:)
October 20th, 2011 at 11:50 pm
Post traumatic stress disorder. You really need to see a professional. Obviously you have been having problems for years, I think it’s time to at least try to deal with your fear and speak to someone about it. Look for someone who does a lot with ptsd, they are generally used to patients who have fear/aversion to psychiatric professionals but bring that up when you first go so they know about it.
October 21st, 2011 at 4:01 am
You have post-traumatic stress disorder. Go and see your GP at your local clinic and see if you can get some counseling and help.
Believe me it helps to talk to people who can listen and understand and help you organise your thoughts. It’s just a mindset that you have and you need to talk to someone and organise your thoughts and your mindset in a way that you can deal with it and accept it and understand it better. You just need to understand your memory better and change how you think about it. A quote that might help a bit:
“If you don’t like something change it; if you can’t change it, change the way you think about it.”
October 21st, 2011 at 9:29 am
You sound like a victim of Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder, which is very common in people who have suffered something as traumatic as this. I’m not a doctor or psychologist, but I would recommend you see one, this condition can worsen and cause your fears to culminate.
Here is the information on PTSD on google health:https://health.google.com/health/ref/Pos…
Good luck, there is a possiblity for treatment on this disorder.
October 21st, 2011 at 3:20 pm
Hey,
Firstly I’m sorry to hear about the trauma you have suffered and the lose of your sister.
Experiencing flashback of past traumatic events can be very common, you may be experience a form of post traumatic stress.
I would obviously suggest seeking some sort of help for you situation, if you do not feel comfortable seeing a therapist straight away, I would suggest maybe doing some reading around trauma, dealing with life changing events and post traumatic stress, book that offer information and advice can be easily found.
Also I would advice you to look for groups on the internet who deal with people who have experienced trauma, where people can share you stories and you may find that you find people going through very similar experiences after stress and loss. You are not alone in this.
Also are you able to talk to you family and friends about the event, If you have a someone close you can talk to about the event, it can commonly make it easier to deal with if you can talk through what happened.
I hope this helps a bit